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Unscientific Preview: Kentucky vs. Vanderbilt


Kentucky vs. Vanderbilt
Gametime: 8:00pm
Location: Lexington, KY
Television: ESPN 2

Why, hello there Vanderbilt! It’s been what, about a year? You look great. I mean, sure, you sort of need this game to get to Bowl eligibility. And yes, you’ve lost 4 straight. And sure, just a month or so ago you were hosting college gameday. The world of college football may have forgotten you like a random bus station skank, but you’re important to us as a Kentucky fanbase, Vandy. Hell, you might be one of the more important games of the year for us. Mostly because you’re winnable and get us to 7. Which gets us fairly close to a major bowl. So for your suckery and your ability to be beat, we love you. And we’ll call you the day after. Far from a bus station skank are you… you’re more of a mid-level sports bar skank. And for that, we love you even more.

Offense: Will the real Kentucky please stand up? We’ve seen this team struggle to move the ball against the Florida and put up 5. We’ve seen this team explode for 38 against Georgia. We’ve seen brilliance, we’ve seen ineptitude. So really, most times when Kentucky has the ball I simply focus on happier things… like bears falling out of trees onto trampolines…

For Vandy, their highest offensive output this season was 38, against Rice on September 13. The ‘Dores haven’t put up more than 14 since September 20. There was a QB controversy midseason as starer Chris Nickson was benched in favor of Mackenzi Adams, and neither have really flourished. Vandy is last in the conference in total offense, and last in total passing, due in no small part to their QB “situation”. Pacing the Dores on the ground is RB Jared Hawkins who isn’t all that bad.
Advantage: Randall Cobb is an explosive player and capable of igniting this offense. That, plus Vandy’s inability to look even remotely decent gives the nod to UK.

Defense: Vandy comes into this showdown currently ranked 10th in the conference in total defense. They are most susceptible to the rush, giving up 140 per game on the ground. This bodes well for Kentucky. Vandy is surprisingly adept at defending the pass.

For the Cats, again, my answer is, “Who knows?”. This defensive unit has played every game imaginable this season. Close wins, blow out losses, gashed through the air, gashed through the ground, etc. To put it mildly this is either a crappy defense capable of great play or a great defense capable of crappy play. We shall see on Saturday, as this truly is a great opportunity for the Wildcats to show who they really are.

Coaching: Bobby Johnson and Rich Brooks are miracle workers at their respective schools. They play in arguably the toughest division in all of college football and they have made their teams competitive. The difference? The post-season. Brooks is looking for his third-straight Bowl… Johnson is first. But both guys do it well, and most importantly, do it clean.

Random Page 2 Google Image Search for Wildcat:

Random Page 2 Google Image Search for Commodore:

Advantage: So in an effort to be funny with your play on words, you make me feel bad that a Cheetah’s home got destroyed? Oh boo hoo. That Cheetah should do what any rational person would do if their home was being destroyed… get in his Lexus and drive off. This is why cats, by sheer Darwinian nature, suck. Well, that and the fact they shit in a little box.

Overall: The Commodores are 0-17 since 1982 in games where they could become bowl eligible. Additionally, they’ve lost 10 of the last 12 against Kentucky. The Cats have reason to be confident about their offense and performance last week, despite a loss, while the Vanderbilt failtrain continues to click clack along. It’s a win for Kentucky, going away, and the Cats get to that important 7th win.

Kentucky 35
Vandy 17

One Response

  1. MY Unscienctific Preview: Being a UK dropout I’m suprised you hold them at such a high level. On the other hand I’m glad to see that u realize UK is not to blame for your stupidity but merely being from Kentucky. Oh by way u dp know that Kentucky invented the tooth brush right? If it were invented anywhere else they would have called it a teethbrush.

    Vanderbilt- 24
    Kentucky- 21

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